Ever wonder what’s on the mind of today’s most notable people? Well, don’t miss our unbelievable roundup of the best and most talked about quotes of the day:

"Who among us has not swiped a vine from the local grapery? A ruler from the measurementarium? Candy from the Skittle Hut?"


—Elizabeth Warren
On shoplifting


"My latest single isn’t getting as much run as I hoped it would, because scientists discovered a frequency in it that makes dogs kill themselves."

On avoiding being labeled a one-hit wonder


"I forgot how to swim."

—Michael Phelps