Coming Clean: Juicy Fruit Has Announced That The White Dust On Their Sticks Of Gum Is Regular-Ass Dust, And If That’s A Deal Breaker For You, They Understand

In an age when genuine acts of corporate responsibility are few and far between, one of the biggest names in the gum industry just boldly opted to put its reputation on the line with a refreshingly transparent admission: Juicy Fruit has announced that the white dust on their sticks of gum is regular-ass dust, and if…

Jesus, They’re Really Taking This Hard: The 7 Unaccompanied Toddlers Who Showed Up At My Grandma’s Funeral To Mourn And How Intensely Each Was Grieving

For some reason, a bunch of unaccompanied toddlers came to my grandma’s funeral last week. It’s still unclear where their parents were or how they knew my grandma, but they were all grieving very hard, to the point where it was a huge distraction. Here’s a list of all the toddlers who showed up at my grandma’s funeral

The Saga Continues: J.K. Rowling Has Revealed That She Herself Once Snuck Into Hogwarts To Steal Snape’s Underwear And Then Sold It To Perverts On Craigslist For $15 Each

Harry Potter fans, brace yourselves, because there’s been a major update to the story of the Boy Who Lived, and it is going to make your day: J.K. Rowling has revealed that she herself once snuck into Hogwarts to steal Snape’s underwear and then sold it to perverts on Craigslist for $15 each.

Danger Imminent: This Family Has About 30 Seconds To Get Grandpa To The Car Before He Starts Making Inappropriate Comments About The Production Of ‘Hairspray’ They Just Saw

Things were going pretty smoothly for the last two hours at the Reginald County Playhouse in Keene, New Hampshire, but now that the cast has taken its final bow, danger is imminent for this family, which has about 30 seconds to get Grandpa to the car before he starts making inappropriate comments about the production…