Senator Lindsey Graham’s sudden death has been met with a bipartisan outpouring of tributes in D.C., but none more moving than the President’s, who went above and beyond to honor his longtime ally: President Trump just signed an Executive Order allowing Lindsey Graham’s corpse to remain in office for another full term.
Wow…it looks like Lindsey Graham’s legacy will live on through Lindsey Graham’s dead body. He sure must’ve meant a lot to President Trump!
In a press conference this morning, President Trump signed E.O. 14415: Letting Lindsey Graham’s Corpse Keep Doing Lindsey Graham’s Job into law, allowing the body of the late South Carolina Republican to remain in his Senate seat for another six-year term. The president stated that “very little will change” in this arrangement, and that he expects a smooth transition of power from the living Sen. Graham to dead Sen. Graham, explaining that, “Lindsey voted however he was told to vote, so when it’s time for Sen. Graham’s dead body to legislate, we’ll know exactly where he stands on every issue, because that was never his decision when he was alive anyway.”
“Lindsey passed away doing what he loved, and that was being senator, so holding office even after dying is what he would’ve wanted, it’s what everyone wants, and I’m making it happen,” Trump continued, before White House aides wheeled out a gurney where Sen. Graham’s cadaver lay under a white sheet. Trump proceeded to remove the sheet entirely, revealing Lindsey Graham’s lifeless, unclothed body in full, and swore the dead Senator into office.
Sources present say Graham’s eyes were wide open.
Say what you will about our president, that is a powerful way to memorialize a friend! To see Lindsey Graham left in power despite being dead is proof that President Trump rewards loyalty above all else. Simply beautiful. We offer our condolences to Sen. Graham’s loved ones.
