While the enormous tipping bucket at Hurricane Harbor’s Paradise Island is usually a favorite among park visitors, who love getting soaked by the huge torrent of water it periodically dumps on top of fun-seeking patrons, this park landmark quickly became a site of humiliation and outrage when it tipped over and dumped out the corpse of former al Qaeda leader and 9/11 mastermind Osama bin Laden. Guests immediately started booing and throwing their flip-flops at the lifeless body of the terrorist kingpin.
Needless to say, families who had been looking for a fun and carefree day at the waterpark were not happy to see the man responsible for so many American deaths flop out of the big bucket of water and smack damply onto the asphalt. Hurricane Harbor has received hundreds of complaints and negative reviews in the hours since one of the least popular militant extremists of all time flopped onto the ground right in front of countless unsuspecting families.
“I brought my kids here today so that they could slide down the Tsunami Surge, not so that the bloated carcass of Osama bin Laden could fall on their heads out of a big bucket,” said Parker Westbrook, a Hurricane Harbor visitor whose three children were standing beneath the tipping bucket when Osama bin Laden’s body was dumped out. “I came here for fun, and instead I’m spending the whole day teaching my kids how to give the middle finger so they can flip off bin Laden’s dead body instead of going to eat funnel cake.”
Witnesses say that after the initial commotion, park employees took action and finally scooped up bin Laden’s dead body, put it in an inner tube, and let it circulate around the lazy river for the next three hours until SEAL Team 6 arrived to dump Osama bin Laden’s body into Lake Lanier.
Here’s hoping the executives in charge figure out how to make sure Osama bin Laden’s corpse never finds its way back into the theme park’s water system, otherwise Hurricane Harbor Atlanta will start to develop a reputation as the water park that drops former al Qaeda members right on top of their visitors.
