Yep, we’re not afraid to say it: Some members of the Kardashian family are a bit more probable than others. If that makes you mad, too bad. Sometimes the truth hurts. We know it might land us in some hot water, but here’s a list of all the Kardashians, ranked by their likelihood.
8. Kylie Jenner
You may love her lip gloss line, but we’ll be the first to say that there’s almost no chance of Kylie Jenner. Come for us if you want to—it’s safe to say we’re not going to be reading our comments or mentions on this one.
7. Khloe Kardashian
Yep. You heard us. There’s only around a 9 percent likelihood that Khloe Kardashian is. Sorry, but appearing on Celebrity Apprentice and having a husband did not do anything to up the odds of Khloe. If hearing that makes you angry, ask yourself: Are you mad at us, or are you just mad at the truth?
6. Rob Kardashian
We know what you’re thinking right now: “Rob Kardashian is the sixth-most-likely Kardashian??? Even after all the Blac Chyna drama??” Yes, he is, and don’t bother whining to us about how we ranked him way too low. We. Don’t. Even. Care.
5. Kris Jenner
Yep… We’re calling it like we see it… Kris Jenner is pretty much fifty-fifty. That’s just how the cookie crumbles, Kris! #Sorrynotsorry.
4. Caitlyn Jenner
Easily one of the more possible Kardashians, Caitlyn Jenner comes in at number four. You might not think that makes sense given the fact that she might, but guess what? She probably won’t. Drag us all you want in the comments, but at the end of the day, we’re writing the list and you’re not.
3. Kim Kardashian
Kim Kardashian? Absolutely. There is, of course, a chance of not Kim Kardashian, but given that she literally has three children and lives in California, odds are good that Kim. We suspect a few Keeping Up With The Kardashians die-hards are not going to be happy about this one… but that’s not our problem.
2. Kendall Jenner
Between her modeling career, her brown hair, and her beloved dog, Kendall Jenner is almost definitely. We’d project about 89 percent likelihood of Kendall, and we’re pretty sure that a few years from now, everyone will be agreeing with us.
1. Kourtney Kardashian
Kourtney is the most likely Kardashian by a mile. You can take it or leave it, because we went there and we’re NOT going back. If you thought Kourtney was impossible… sorry, sweetie! We couldn’t disagree more.