You might want to stop reading this story now if you don’t want your day completely ruined and your worst fears confirmed, because this is an enormous fucking disaster: You just did something weird.

Jesus Christ. Why did you do that? It’s stories like these that really make you wonder why you choose to behave in the way that you do.

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In an ideal world, you would act cool and normal at all times so that the people around you would know that you are not an absolute freak. But unfortunately, you’ve just proven once again that you are capable of doing stuff that is off-putting and strange. Observers have confirmed that what you just did made everyone around you cringe and ask themselves, “What was up with that?” which is exactly the type of outcome you should be avoiding if you want people to like you and think you’re good.

Damn it. If only this had gone differently and you hadn’t just done that. It’s not clear how you’re going to recover from this one—if recovery is even possible.

One of the most painful things about your current situation is the fact that tons of people in the vicinity not only noticed you do the weird thing you just did, but are now also thinking about it and letting it inform their opinions of you. Plus, the weird thing you did came totally out of nowhere—you didn’t have a good reason for doing it other than the fact that you are sometimes just super weird.

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It has been confirmed that people are going to talk to each other about the thing you have done when you are not around.

The awkwardness of your faux pas is currently bringing down the mood of everyone around you. If you’re feeling bad about what you’ve just done, that’s totally justified, because this is, by all accounts, an absolute train wreck.

Fuck. This totally sucks. There’s no undoing the weird thing you did, and unfortunately, people are probably going to remember it forever. At this point, your best bet is to try not to do anything weird in the future. Best of luck—we’re rooting for you.

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