Ever wonder what’s on the mind of today’s most notable people? Well, don’t miss our unbelievable roundup of the best and most talked about quotes of the day:
"I used to train dogs to repeatedly jump up to inhale the air from in front of people’s faces just as they were about to breathe it in. The CIA killed a lot of people that way before we realized it was a lot more fun to just shoot them."
On his qualifications for being secretary of state
"Humans have 10 fingers but only two lungs, so it’s no surprise that lungs are much more valuable on the open market."
"When I was a kid, no one wanted to wear headgear. It was considered ‘dorky’ and ‘lame.’ Now kids love wearing it. In fact, you can’t go anywhere without seeing kids tearing headgear out of other kids’ mouths and jamming it into their own. It’s nice to see headgear finally be ‘cool.’"