Care To Engage In A Rambling Debate With Me On My Nephew’s Politically Charged Facebook Post?

Posted Aug. 20, 2014

When I checked Facebook this morning, I noticed my nephew had made a politically charged post about something he appears to care passionately about. Being who I am, a divorced 52-year-old retail manager whose profile picture is the image of a car, I was immediately seized with the urge to make an appropriate response. For this reason, I ask: Would anyone care to engage in a rambling debate with me on my nephew’s politically charged Facebook post?

When I saw my nephew’s politically charged Facebook post, it occurred to me that my aggressive and radically misguided opinions could be valuable to my nephew and his friends if belligerently shoved down their throats through an extended, fairly condescending rant. That’s why I am interested in inserting myself into the comment thread and carrying out a lengthy and convoluted diatribe through a series of ad hominem attacks.

So, what do you say? Anyone care to join me?

As long as you have a couple hours in the middle of a weekday to get into it with a middle-aged man, I’ll gladly argue with you on my nephew’s Facebook post. All are welcome. Strangers and family members, young and old. I’m not above bickering with children. In fact, I myself will be wildly immature throughout our debate, frequently supporting my claims with links to dubious articles that I’ll cite as hard, irrefutable evidence that I’m right.

As long as you have a couple hours in the middle of a weekday to get into it with a middle-aged man, I’ll gladly argue with you on my nephew’s Facebook post.

Of course, there are other things I hope to do during our debate as well. Perhaps I’ll ramble on and on about something without saying anything at all. Or, maybe I’ll copy and paste an entire essay into a comment, refusing to separate the paragraphs so it’s just one giant block of unreadable text. If things get a little too heated, I know I can always go out with the old staple, “You’re too young to understand these things.”

Anyways, let me know if you’re interested. In the meantime, I’ll be commenting, “Is this supposed to be journalism?” on every article I can find.