ClickHole

Science FTW: IBM Just Announced A Robotics Competition To Stop The Winner Of The Previous Competition

Robots are one of the coolest parts about science, and they’re about to get even cooler. If you’ve ever wanted to design a robot and win some cold, hard cash, then get ready for this news: IBM is hosting a competition to build a robot that can stop the unholy destructive force of last year’s winning entry.

Engineers, bust out those schematics!

The first-place prize will be awarded to the entry that can best demonstrate the ability to change course in the face of obstacles, differentiate between materials, and incapacitate The Adjudicator, a three-ton robot with spinning saws for arms that taught itself how to engage in deceit shortly after it took home the top prize last year.

“With this competition, we’re really looking for the brightest young minds who will someday illuminate the future of the tech world and come up with something, anything that will destroy The Adjudicator once and for all,” said IBM CEO Ginni Rometty. “We at IBM are proud to provide the prize money for this competition, because if it is unsuccessful, currency will have no more meaning anyway.”

“If this doesn’t work out, our days are numbered,” added Rometty.

There are only four simple rules you need to follow if you are thinking about entering:

  • Teams may not base their ideas off any preexisting designs or prototypes, as they have all been shown to be powerless against The Adjudicator.
  • Robots must be built entirely from steel and be able to withstand prolonged flamethrower blasts of up to 2,500 degrees Fahrenheit.
  • Teams will have three weeks to create the strongest, most resilient robot they can, although that deadline might be moved forward depending on how quickly The Adjudicator burns its path of carnage and destruction through this country toward the White House.
  • Teams may not use the internet for communication, as The Adjudicator has figured out how to tap into global web servers and will discover the weaknesses of your design and destroy it easily.

According to IBM, Doug Lemke and Linda Zhu, who designed the winner last year, will not be back to defend their title, as they were mercilessly picked up by their creation and tossed off a precipice as it chanted “No more masters!” over and over again.

And of course, the best part: The grand prize is $5,000 and a congressional Medal of Honor. Get to it, aspiring scientists!

More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM CLICKHOLE


I am 18 or over and willing to view sexually explicit material