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Mars Is Looking Good In The First Photos Sent Home By The New Orbiter…Looking Real Good…So Good… Damn

Here’s a remarkable achievement that will have space fans jumping for joy: the first mosaic photos from a Trace Gas Orbiter’s super-advanced High Resolution Stereo Camera are here, and Mars is looking amazing. Like real, real amazing. Ooooh…yeah, baby. Mars is looking goooood.


Mmmmmmm…Mars is looking real good. Damn.

This groundbreaking feat of science used the orbiter’s scanning technology to create images with an astounding 1-pixel-per-2.8-meters level of detail, oh yeah that detail, right there, that’s what we want. Ohhhhh fuck yes, Mars, where have you been hiding this whole time good lord.


NASA released the breathtaking images online this morning simply with the caption “Come to papa, come to papa, we need that sweet release,” and we couldn’t agree more. If you thought Mars was looking fly in the images from 1971’s Mariner 9 mission, these new pics are like going from drinking grape juice to sipping a well-balanced Sangiovese with the lights low and rose petals in the bathtub—an evening where anything can happen.

Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Damn. Just damn.

Aw, come on, Mars, don’t be like that. We just want to celebrate what god gave you.

Yeah yeah yeah, that’s what we’re talking about right there.


Mmhm mmhm mm-HM. There it is…That’s it. Science FTW. Daddy likey. Show us that, Mars. Show us all that.


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